Maybe you found your way here because…
You grew up in a conservative, fundamentalist home and church and now you’re feeling disillusioned, confused, and betrayed. Perhaps you’re not even sure how to describe what you’re experiencing. All you know is that you’re not doing well, and you recognize that your past belief system is disturbing you.
Therapy is a place where you can:
- Find yourself, your identity, your beliefs, your values, etc…
- Learn to love yourself, trust yourself, & develop self-compassion.
- Reconnect with your body & your intuition.
- Deconstruct old belief systems that no longer fit you.
- Discover hope, faith, & spirituality that align with your authentic beliefs.
Hope is out there, and healing is possible…
What’s so bad about religious trauma anyway?
10 things that separate religious trauma from other trauma…
1. It most commonly starts during early developmental years when we have very few resources to defend ourselves.
2. The trauma happens over a long period of time (side note: both of these are fundamental for developing complex PTSD).
3. Most often teaches us to disconnect from our bodies and doubt our intuition.
4. Essentially brainwashes us to believe and act within a rigid set of standards with the constant threat of eternal consequences for straying from those beliefs.
5. Impacts all aspects of our lives (family, social, mental, sexual, spiritual, etc…).
6. Creates cognitive dissonance after leaving (ie- having conflicting beliefs and the discomfort of navigating life with these inconsistencies).
7. Raised to be suspicious of therapy and other forms of thought which keeps us from getting help and questioning our beliefs.
8. Betrayal trauma & institutional betrayal trauma (ie- being betrayed by trusted leaders & institutions denying harm done and/or institutions enabling further abuse).
9. Disconnects us from mainstream culture & traditions which means we often struggle to fit in even after we leave the church and/or find community & friendships outside of the church. (Side note: this works a lot like domestic violence perpetrators who purposely isolate victims to keep the victims dependent on them which makes the abuse seem practically inescapable).
10. Most of the time, religious abuse is subtle. It’s hidden behind the cloaks of manipulation, coercion, and control.
Still wondering what that means for you?
It means that if you grew up in a traumatizing fundamentalist religion or have been attending for an extended period of time, you’re likely dealing with symptoms of complex PTSD without even realizing it.
Complex PTSD related to religious abuse looks like:
* Consistently struggling with anxiety & depression.
* Difficulty with emotional regulation.
* Delayed social, emotional, & sexual development.
* Sexual dysfunction.
* Emotional flashbacks (re-experiencing past traumas often without the visual component to remind us of what we are re-experiencing).
* Debilitating shame.
* Feeling isolated and different from everyone around you.
And the list could go on and on…
Maybe you think therapy isn’t for you because…
What you experienced wasn’t “that bad” and you’re telling yourself “I just need to suck it up and move on.”
My answer: Why suffer when you could feel better? What’s the harm in trying? If it doesn’t work, then you don’t have to keep coming.
Maybe you think no one can relate.
My answer: I may not have your exact same experience, but I grew up in a fundamentalist, evangelical Christian home. When I was a teenager and a young adult, I was part of a Christian cult.
Secondary Answer: Besides being able to relate on that level, as a therapist, my greatest goal is for my clients to leave feeling seen, heard, and understood. I love listening to people and hearing their experiences. I will ask questions for clarification and do my best to see things from your perspective.
Maybe you think therapy is going to be another experience of “someone forcing their beliefs on you.”
My answer: I want you to find wholeness in whatever form that looks like for you. My job is to mirror back what I’m hearing and seeing from you so that you can uncover your authentic self and beliefs. I am a spiritual person, and my beliefs will shine through whatever I’m doing because they are part of who I am; however, it is not my place to convince you to believe the way I believe.
Why choose me as your therapist?
Studies have shown that the most important factor for beneficial therapy is the relationship between the therapist and the client, so it’s really important you find a therapist that you like.
You’ll like my approach if…
- You want a therapist who believes you are the ultimate authority in your own life. You have the answers within you. I’m just here to help you find them.
- You’re open to using art, music, meditation, nature, ritual, and other creative avenues to heal.
- You’re willing to look deep within to find healing, even though it’s really scary.
- You want a therapist who has their own experience with complex trauma and has done work to heal from it.
Other clients have noted that they like working with me because…
- They leave sessions with tools that they can use.
- I’m authentic & when it’s helpful, I share my own experiences.
- I believe in doing my own therapy.
- I do more than nod my head and occasionally mumble an “mm hm” while they talk (PS, if your therapist isn’t more involved than that, please love yourself enough to find a good therapist, even if it isn’t me).
If you feel like we’d be a good fit, love yourself enough in this moment to press the button and schedule a free consultation so that we can discuss your needs and make sure we’re a good fit. Regardless, I encourage you to consider the kindest thing that you can do for yourself today and do it. You deserve it!
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56 Expressway
5601 NW 72nd Street, Suite 178-J
Warr Acres, OK 73132
Virtual in all of OK